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The Future With No Past
I've lost something too important.
My forgotten memory filled with darkness--
Surrounding me in darkness.
All my life is darkness.
Only one moment of my life
Was filled with light
But where and when that light
Shines upon
Does not give me comfort.
That light is the reason
My life is filled with darkness.
That light--
Torturous pain and unforgivable.
That light is my demon.  
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 1 0
This Is My Survival
I'm the one
Who enters a conversation
Like it's a battlefield.
I'm the human
Whose mind is a mess
Of abstract pieces
That don't fit anywhere.
I have to
Bend to my opposite
To make everyone happy.
I'm the outsider
Who has to lose themselves
In order to survive.
I'm the retard
That's the screw-up and scapegoat
For everything.
I have to cope
With people that call themselves normal
But are more dysfunctional than I am.
I had to face obstacles
That are considered easy by everyone else.
I'm the one
Who had to fight everything
To find who I really am.
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 1 0
Let Me Break
Don't tell me to stay strong.
Don't tell me to it's gonna be okay.
For now,
The only silver lining
Is a spider's thread.
Today, the arrogant sun
Froze the world.
We're truly lost in our wanderings,
So drunk on gluttony and cowardliness
That even our inner demons
Weep for us.
Let me tear myself apart,
Leave me in tears.
Let this poison
Flow itself out.
Let me self-destruct,
Leave me in ruins
Before the night rolls in.
I can't do both.
Leave me alone
So I can rise higher than the moon.
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 2 0
Sometimes I feel like
I'm emotionless,
Yet my emotions are there--
Just bundled up
So tightly, so close--
That I've lost track on
Who's who.
Why do you tell me I'm emotionless,
That I don't have emotions.
In my opinion,
I think it's not wise
To wear fear on your sleeves.
Why do you treat me like a
Retard, a kid?
Saying that I make no progress.
Maybe if you stop treating me like a child,
Then I'll show you the progress
I've been hiding.
There's a heart in my head.
(I want to fell,
I know my emotion but
Why are we so distant?_
I'm lost and I know I feel.  
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 1 0
I Fall
Today I did fall
But I've already flown higher
Than your scum.
You've tired to destroy everything I've created
--A dream of a just and equal world--
But you can't destroy the image
That shows your true self.
I did not fall
In your victory.
I fought the chocking hell-fire,
Withstood the fire rain.
When you come to meet God,
With images of heaven flashing before
Your soon-to-be-wild-eyes,
He would greet you with a smile--
A smile carrying wraith that
Would have made the devil whimper childishly
As He pushes you down to Hell.
Today may be your victory,
Today you celebrate on
The rivers of blood.
Your respectful tomb will never exist,
Your name will be said with spite.
I want to condemn you as
Long as I like
But in the end,
My hands are the same shade of red as yours.
In the end,
You'll fall like me.  
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 1 0
Not even a thousand pictures
Of bloodied children
Won't make you shed a tear,
Won't make you offer warmth.
As I'm writing this on the page,
My red hands--stained by a
Most unusual yet evil actions--
Stain and bleed on sorrowful words.
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 0 0
Why do you hate the dark?
The dark is always there,
Beginning to end,
The first and early memory.
Why do you strike the dark
With flashlights, beacons, headlights, lamps, etc.
They always cling to you--
Even after that torture
You gave them.
They listened to your
Cries, shouts, and fears.
They just love you too much.
They have no intention
To harm you,
You just do that to yourself.
Just stop hurting them, okay?
They're just stuck in an
Abusive relationship.
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 0 0
It's hard to be an individual
In an unique copy & paste world.
It's amazing how quickly
Ideas are spread--
Repeated and twisted to
One's cruel & sometimes desperate
Hey world,
Why are you having
Fun in causing confusion?
Are you that bored at the
Idea of peace?
Even the cruel overpowering sheep-dog
Loves to be in the comfort of the cage.
While it's not wrong
To be an individual,
We've divided ourselves so much
That we couldn't understand
The simple rhymes we used to sing.
Sorry, I couldn't
Get the pop culture reference--
Forever repeated but meaning
Forgotten long ago.
I lost the generation I never had.
Which are you--
The group or the individual?
So we draw our borders,
Divide into groups,
Follow the cowards and loudmouths,
Not even releasing the meaningless of it all
After our last whimpering breath.
These kindhearted lies
And twisted hypocrisy
That I've been desperately believed--
Can I make them a plain and simple dream?  
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 1 0
Opinion on End of The World
It's not the end of the world--
No matter on who you ask.
This entire planet
Is the center stage for chaos--
Something that remained constant
For as long as the hominoids
(Just in case you didn't know).
Whether you'd like it or not,
It's not a dream you can simply
Categorize as a comedy or tragedy.
It doesn't matter if
You calmly accept it
Or haphazardly deny it,
The world continues
On with its unregulated
Roller-coaster ride.
Even when you try to back away
To admire to view more clearly,
You fall back into the chaos
In hilarious fashion.
Good and evil are
Myths and legends
That humanity makes up
For their own
Entertainment or insignificance.
Almighty lord or
Multiple gods and goddesses--
Not matter what or who--
Luck and chance still have the upper hand.
Creation and destruction--
Come on, spin with me
With our sanity on the line.
Tell me,
Why are you shocked at
So many reoccurring events
In a numbing manner?
Just state your not-so-unique opinion
In the pre-written multiple choice.
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 0 0
Losing Words
Melodies of words
Floating on the tip of my breath--
So beautiful, so cruel--
I cannot understand them
Even after all these years.
Every time someone speaks words,
Do they really understand what
Those words mean>
Tangled up and chocking,
we sutter (or that's what I think we do).
So many words thrown around,
Can we even remember what
Their original definitions are?
I want to be in love
And show my love
But do my loves
Completely understand
What I'm saying?
Strewn apart and abandoned--
I guess even words and humans
Are one the same side of the coin.
Discovered and redefined--
Constantly rechecked
To just be proven right or wrong,
Especially when it is in plain sight.
Which is hypocrisy?
Which in honesty?
Is it really words that matter
Or communication and understanding>
Losing my meaning
And sense of self--
Just like everyone else.
Do the words make sense
Or do we have any meaning at all?
Just wondering
If you can understand my words.
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 4 0
I'm Sorry That The Times Are A-Changing
In monotone cycle,
Everything changes.
Churches lost souls,
Its loving walls echo
A chorus of stigma it
Refuses to let go.
Government losing faith
In the people who know
Their rightful promises.
Skin lines dissolving
Into petty stereotypes
Into T.V. lines.
Mini-documentaries of tears
Are left misunderstood
By those who fight for justice.
I fear the dawn of the new days
Burning with a love
That separates and divides
Like always.
Tomorrow comes along,
Leaving today a fallen
Domino in the trail of history
I've already forgotten.
The painting of "truth"
So critically acclaimed
Dissolves into its true face.
Hey, people of today--
Don't play make-believe
If you aren't gonna make it real
Or fall into poison-making of yesterday.
Hey, people of today--
Tomorrow isn't set in stone;
Don't let in live in
The mess of yesterday.
Don't make us lose tomorrow.
Why do we have
Uniquely follow the leader?
A world of strife called for unity
Against a banner challenging the status quo.
Hands coloured red
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 3 0
Sad Songs
Here on this blank paper,
I wrote my tears
And threw it into the sea of people.
Those words
Contain a private scribble
That I suddenly want to show the world.
With messy handwriting
And definitions scattered,
I cast the bottle recklessly.
It's not meant for someone
But I hope whoever picks it up,
Please don't shatter my message.
Please listen to the words
With everyday eyes.  
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 8 2
Little child,
You want to run in the dark?
Could the monster
Be livin' there?
Ah, so persistent!
But here's an order:
Turn on the lamp
To guide you home.
Carry the marble red star
Through the dark.
First steps on
The tiled path (RUNNING).
Flick the lights
To scare the monsters away.
Drink dreams:
(PINK FLOWER) water.
Walk towards the
Lantern's home.
A room for relief.
Cleasin' oneself.
The tearman's song
Reached his end.
Reached the end.
Cry over the defiled and dead girl.
The bratty art student
Killed themselves.
Tearman's songs back
In the case. (DON'T)
The lights
Flicker on and off!
The room bursts into light;
It's safe now.
A monster of the light appears.
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 1 0
In My Head
I've got people in my head.
I've got a bigot.
I've got a anti-racist.
I've got a lover.
I've got a racist.
I've got a troll.
I've got a fact-checker.
I've got a conspiracy theorist.
I've got a protester.
I've got a bystander.
I've got an adult.
I've got a kid.
I've got a fighter.
I've got a coward.
I've got a loudmouth.
I've got a listener.
I've got an animal.
I've got a plant.
These people
In my head--
They sometimes
Get lost off the rails.
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 3 1
Hate is there/Love is hard
It's an opposite reaction,
A poison that can be felt.
It's always there
Out of ignorance and fear.
I'm done,
I'm tired of hate,
Always coiling its chains on me,
Making me judge a thousand
Unread books.
That's it,
I'm done,
I'm done with hating,
Frequently shooting
And yelling illogical things
Of paranoia and pride.
Love is hard to maintain.
It's stronger than a piece
Of spider silk
Yet one easy slip
Could plummet me into hurt.
I'm done with hating,
With the slurs,
The rhetoric,
The idolizing.
I'm done with hate.  
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 0 0
Laugh, Joke
Something "unsuspected" happened.
Others are celebrating,
Others are crying.
Others are in euphoria,
Others are in denial.
Others just laugh.
Why do you laugh?
Why do you joke so much?
I understand the need
To release
And the different forms of reactions,
But why do you say,
"It basically won't do anything."
Yes, it is a big idiot
But idiots make dangerous friends
With damaging ideals.
When it uttered lies,
Prejudices become the
Spotlight for
"Good old days."
Fear gained a new
Shipment of slaves.
Hatred became bold
In bystander silence.
Can you laugh
At loving families
Ripped apart>
Can you laugh
At a child's coffin,
A child's body bag>
Can you still laugh
As mines choke the air>
To those who believe
It's a new dawn,
You're already charred
Beyond recognition
In you're devilish "holy" flames.
You know,
They used to laugh too,
Back then.
Saying it won't do anything.
People are still laughing
And denying at the graves too.  
:iconsilencedbook9:Silencedbook9 1 0


Brilliance or Failure? Scientists can't tell~ Poem
Brilliance or failure? If scientist's can't tell, 
Then I for sure do not know the answer, 
But there is something that I do know, 
And it's that brilliance is measured in inspiration 
Not numbers. 
It's not brilliant to just be attractive, 
It is not brilliant just to ask for likes or views, 
It is not brilliant to ask money from young people, 
And it is not brilliant to be able to be yourself (Or not being yourself) 
There are no equations that prove that fame equals to brilliance 
Something else that I know is that, 
Sometimes the least expected people, 
Turn out to be the most brilliant... 
It might have been a video that was skipped over, 
It might have been that artist profile that you glanced at, 
It might have been that email that you would never think twice about
But just because they are thought to be:
1) Forgotten 
2) Lonely 
3) Unimportant 
Doesn't take their brilliance away 
:iconlightbleueyes:lightbleueyes 10 7
Poe by Amelia-Wilde Poe :iconamelia-wilde:Amelia-Wilde 184 19
Mature content
My Sweet Death :iconjomoku:Jomoku 5 0
Fight or Flight?
I have just a moment, one tiny moment to prepare. I meet his gaze from across the room and my response is instantaneous. My eyes dilate, heart racing, muscles tensing and a blush across my cheeks. He smirks, probably thinking I’m aroused.
In a way, he's right.
Fight or Flight?
I feel like an animal in this moment, like a rat who will try to escape when threatened and only fight if cornered. Perhaps I could stand perfectly still or play dead in hopes that my predator loses interest...
I rather wish I was a fish right now- one that could swim away or change color to camouflage myself.
And therein lays the problem. I am not entirely sure I what I want.
Oh yes, I want him. His allure is like none another before and that scares me. He makes me want things I've never wanted before. He's young and cocky, ruggedly handsome, someone who I thought was so beyond me. Someone who makes me feel beautiful and sexy, wanted.
And I hardly know him...
What am I doing here?
Fight or
:iconprettyflour:prettyflour 22 27
Mature content
The Dead Flower :icony2jinstien:Y2Jinstien 4 1
We Are Broken But Strong
We are in pain, and for some of us the pain never leaves
We are angry, it's like a ticking time bomb just waiting for someone to set us off
We are sad, watching as life goes on while we can't find the will to stand
We fight our demons, disorders and conditions that try to hold us down
We hide our tears, pretending everything will be all right 
We are hurting, and some days it feels like we'll never heal. 
We are broken.
But that does not define us. 
We are in pain, but that pain is sometimes outshone by the love of our friends
We are angry, but each and every day we work to let go and forgive
We are sad, but at the dawn of the new day we pick ourselves up again and try
We fight our demons, and sometimes we even win
We hide our tears, but those tears are sometimes happy as those we love help mend our hearts
We are hurting, but through that we can connect to others and lift them up as they fight to become something more. 
We are broken, but we are also strong.&
:iconqueen-of-ice101:Queen-of-Ice101 12 15
Hold me Gaza

keep your eyes open
in this endless night
as a sentinel
with no voice
you wait for the faster star
that will take you...
and that will save you...
keep your eyes open
in the waking
of the long night
beat harder
your heart
is a single sound, which
never dies
yes... will never dies...
this night sails fast
over the world
I hear its noise
while I'm falling asleep
but... I'll not dream...
not this night
hold me
between war and the wonder
we will
understand this night
all the way
of this love
because we are
we are not alone
hold me
we will burn 'till
to light the last sky

:iconquadraro:Quadraro 6 1
There Was a Girl...
There was a girl
Who'd wake up Monday morning
Excited to work today and tomorrow change the world
What happened to her?
I stressed her out until she became anxious
Took her rest until she became weak
Told her she wasn't good enough until she believed it
And now she had to write this poem
To cope with what I've done
:iconrebel-of-argon:Rebel-of-Argon 7 1
Beast Boy sneakers by Picolo-kun Beast Boy sneakers :iconpicolo-kun:Picolo-kun 7,588 120
Parade Of Characters
Hook taps the pencil nervously on the paper, his hair is a frazzled mop on top of his head and he sighs dramatically.
Foil enters and looks over his shoulder at the page, but aside from a few nicks from the pencil’s tip, there’s only smudge-marks from the completely used eraser on the pencil’s end. Foil takes a seat beside Hook and grips his shoulder in camaraderie, “What’s wrong?”
Hook sighs again and shakes his head. “Hasn’t anyone seen Muse? Seriously, I’ve got nothing here,” he taps the paper with the pencil and leaves more tick marks on the otherwise mangled but empty page.
Foil shakes his head. “I heard she was in the Bahamas, but I don’t know how true that is.”
“What?!” Hook throws down the pencil and folds his arms and shakes his shaggy head. “Now wouldn’t that just figure! Writer hasn’t had a proper vacation in years and she’s off gallivanting around a beach drinki
:iconroadkillkitten:roadkillKitten 12 13
Untitled by tolagunestro Untitled :icontolagunestro:tolagunestro 645 95 Cast of Characters - Part 1 by AppleStixTime Cast of Characters - Part 1 :iconapplestixtime:AppleStixTime 21 1 Dantez Siblings Busts (traditional) by The-MAD-Overlord Dantez Siblings Busts (traditional) :iconthe-mad-overlord:The-MAD-Overlord 6 2 Star Wars Anakin and Ahsoka by TereseNielsen Star Wars Anakin and Ahsoka :iconteresenielsen:TereseNielsen 3,167 285 Star Wars: Princess Leia by daekazu Star Wars: Princess Leia :icondaekazu:daekazu 7,525 363
All the Homo
You are not stupid. You are not worthless. And you are worth everything in the world to me. I'll be damned if anyone tells you otherwise and you believe the piece of crap words that leave their mouth. I may not be dark, I may not be strong, but the least I can do is love you. And it's difficult to show the love I feel for you. I love you, and I will protect you. I may not be much, but I'm here right? I just hope you stay as well. I couldn't write a poem because I'm useless when it comes to them >.
:iconvampiresei:VampireSei 4 2




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Silencedbook9's Profile Picture
Artist | Student | Literature
United States
I love books -- either manga, graphic novel, textbooks, and fantasy/sci-fi/realistic fiction/fiction/etc. I like to read, write, and draw.
Please see some of my work before you decide to watch me, okay, because I usually submit a combination of fanart, poems, and other stuff and if you don't like either of them, please don't watch me. I really don't want people to be unhappy with my deviantions.
  • Listening to: Gorillaz and Neru
  • Reading: Coraline
  • Watching: Jacksepticeye's Papers Please
  • Playing: Reading and ocarina
  • Eating: Air!
Quick question for all you guys: If you had a panic attack right at this moment and you had your MP3 or iPod, what would be your 'calm down' song (or playlist just in case you need more than one song.) Please comment below.

Here's mine:
Gorillaz-- Amarillo 

Poets of the Fall--Given And Denied 




Add a Comment:
roadkillKitten Featured By Owner May 20, 2017
I always need a hug! lol

Thanks doll for the :star: on "Parade of Characters"
jayDontae Featured By Owner Apr 23, 2017
Hey duder, thanks so much for your support.. I really appreciate the love  
If you like what you see check out my IG @ jaydontae for much more..

Peace and much love to you ✌️💕
Silencedbook9 Featured By Owner May 20, 2017  Student Writer
No problem!
roadkillKitten Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2017
Thanks for the :star: on "Cast Off Characters"
Silencedbook9 Featured By Owner May 20, 2017  Student Writer
No problem!
roadkillKitten Featured By Owner May 20, 2017
Pettyexpo Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2017  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the fave on The Indian Maiden: Come To Life
Silencedbook9 Featured By Owner May 20, 2017  Student Writer
No problem!
Silencedbook9 Featured By Owner May 20, 2017  Student Writer
No problem!
The-Archaeon Featured By Owner Mar 11, 2017
Thanks for the fave mate. I see Gorillaz in your journal. I like you. :)
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